Sunday, December 23, 2012

Norovirus 2012: Permenet State of Dread

Everyday this week I've sat down to my morning paper to find another story about the horror that is Noro.

It feels as if the authors of these articles are competing to see who is able to worsen my already permanent state of dread.

British newspaper the Daily Mail claim there is a record high suffering with the bug, so it is no wonder I can feel myself being overly vigilant at any given moment when I'm out of the house: analysing every person to see who is looking pale or worse for wears, who - if anyone - is carrying illness bags and I've even started looked at shoes for potential splash marks.

For the first ever time during N season I feel like I'm verging on becoming mentally unstable.

Thinking about the bug so much makes it feel like it's everywhere. In my Emetophobic mind I'm seeing it in the air, lurking in my street and on every surface and object.

As a result I'm obsessively washing my hands more so than I have ever done before - to the point where I'm keeping a record in my head of what objects I've touched to make sure the figure doesn't become too high before I 'wash those germs off' - I've even started using my jumper sleeves to do silly little things like turn off light switches.

Panic attacks have been almost a nightly occurrence, so much so I only head off up to bed at the 'safe' time of 03:00am, just to make sure it'll nearly be morning and daylight should I wake up sick in the hours that follow me settling down for the night.

Basically I'm at a pretty bad place at the moment with Emet and feel completely alone.

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